Last Updated on April 15, 2024 by Angela Vaz
I’m sure you’ve met them.
Those people who aren’t afraid to talk about the past – they’ll narrate everything like a story and you’ll wonder how they did it all.
It’s almost as if they’re impenetrable when it comes to damage.
They’re logical and rational and have an air of tranquility around them.
They’re strong.
They’ve been through dark storms but they’ve emerged unscathed.
And you begin to realize with time, that you want that superpower.
You want to be mentally strong so that almost nothing affects you.
You want to be thick-skinned but you don’t want to lose your compassion.
After spending years watching people, I’ve come up with this simple yet innovative list of traits mentally strong people have.
And I think you’ll like this article very much.
Let’s begin.
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1. They know how to say no
People who are mentally strong have only become that way after years of being a pushover.
Mentally strong people understand they have limited resources, they do not try to do everything.
We all have limited energy.
If we try to workout 6 hours, cook all our meals, attend work for 9-10 hours, and make time to meet friends and do our hobbies – every single day, we will break.
It is imperative to be selective with our time.
And have a good balance of everything that is important to us.
For me, my health and my family come first.
I try my best to be fit, eat right, and spend an insane amount of time with my partner and pups – they give me pure joy.
The remaining time I have – I divide for self-improvement, hobbies and talking/playing with my friends.
It’s taken me a while to come up with a schedule that works for me, but I can honestly say that I live a happy life, a meaningful life.
You have to decide well in advance what you want and be okay with saying no.
Sometimes, you’ll have to say no to people to do what you want.
Saying no to something you don’t want to do, means saying “hell yes” to something you want to do.
You can also say no to an event just to get back home and have a quiet night to yourself because you know that this quiet night will recharge you for the next day.
You cannot pour from an empty cup, so remember to fill it once in a while.
2. They do not run away with their emotions
Shit happens to everyone.
Some have it worse than most, I’ll admit, but nobody’s life is smooth sailing no matter what you see on social media.
Mentally strong people know that when they’re going through a storm, it’s okay to not be okay.
They’ve done it before – they’ve been through crapshows.
But they know that things will get better if they ride out the storm.
They are prepared for the worst and they understand that sometimes, things are out of their control.
They’ll make a list of the actions they can take and they’ll patiently work towards a solution.
3. They know it’s okay to not be okay
They understand that bottling up emotions will only lead to repressed emotions that will surface as anger, depression, or anxiety.
So, when they go through a difficult situation, they deal with it healthily.
They do not drink, do drugs, or try to numb their feelings.
They work through them.
If this involves crying or being enraged – they’ll express their feelings and try to understand what’s happening.
After that, they’ll reach a level of acceptance and then deal with what’s happening.
By being incredibly open-minded, patient, and kind to themselves, they course through difficult situations pretty quickly.
4. They aren’t insecure
Mentally unbreakable people aren’t afraid to admit things they don’t know.
They’re avid listeners and observers.
They’re always looking to learn because they know that knowledge is vital for their survival – physical, mental, and emotional.
So, when they come across unknown territory, they’re quite open and admit they aren’t sure.
They will listen and absorb (like a sponge) everything there is to know about the topic.
They do not let their egos get in the way – they will listen keenly to what you have to say so that they can expand their knowledge on the subject.
5. They are sympathetic
There is a difference between being empathetic and sympathetic.
Mentally strong people are sympathetic.
Empathy is when you put yourself in someone’s shoes and try to understand what they’re going through. Sympathy isn’t like that; it’s when you try to understand what they’re going through from your perspective.
Mentally unbreakable people understand that time is a valuable resource but they’re also kind.
So, when you complain or tell them about a problem you’re facing – they will listen.
They will even give you advice from the heart.
Mentally strong people won’t give you false hope.
Having been through difficulties themselves, they know how pointless that is.
This is why they will give you a listening ear and then give you unbiased, logical advice so that you can help yourself.
They know that the only way you’ll become stronger is if you climb out of your hole yourself, so they will do everything necessary to make sure you’re okay.
A small example of this is when I lost my mother, I got tired of listening to people who kept repeating, “She’s in a better place; you will meet her in heaven – don’t feel bad.”
It didn’t make me feel better.
But my aunt, who had been through so much loss told me, “You’re going to miss her, and life is going to suck for a while, but you’ll learn to live with the pain.”
And even though that remark hurt, it helped me sleep at night.
By simply acknowledging my pain and letting me know that it was going to hurt, she did me better than everyone else combined.
6. They will never stand in the way of someone’s success
When a person is mentally strong and secure, they emanate a certain radiant quality that’s almost like a confident light.
That confidence comes from a place of kindness and positivity.
They do not stand in the way of other people’s success.
They’re more than happy to push others up because they know that a person’s success will only fuel their own joy.
When I was younger, I’d experience pangs of jealousy when others succeeded in their academics/businesses.
But with time, I learned to be happy for others and learn from them.
I realized that envy didn’t get me anywhere.
It was pointless.
Everyone who has succeeded has put in the hours to get there.
It may not seem obvious, especially if they haven’t recorded every single minute of their hard work, but I assure you that they deserve it.
The best thing you can do for someone when they’re succeeding is echo their happiness and it will only amplify your own!
Do not be afraid of sharing your knowledge or skills to help others succeed – Mentally strong people know that they’re making the world a better place and they’re proud of it!
And by constantly helping others and pushing them to succeed, they are always backed up by an army of people who adore them.
7. They know how to simplify complex problems
When I was trying to publish an eBook – I remember how daunting it was. I couldn’t find a topic to write an eBook about, let alone write it.
So, I started small.
- I started a blog and wrote about different topics to understand my writing.
- I tracked what did well and what didn’t.
- I wrote more of what did well and resonated with people.
- This helped me find a good topic for my eBook.
- I then asked myself what a person needs to know to get from point A to point B.
- I wrote down all those points – those points became my chapters.
- I filled in each chapter with everything a person would need to understand the topic the chapter discussed.
- I then formatted the eBook, created a sales page, and went on to marketing.
By breaking down a complex problem into smaller ones, I was able to do the task.
And this is something that not many people talk about.
It’s difficult to just become a Youtube Influencer or an Artist.
But by doing little actions every day – you will slowly get there.
Mentally strong people know that consistency is important so they try to simplify everything they do.
And this is one of the best ways to become mentally unbreakable.
Know how to divide a complex problem into simple tasks that you can approach with ease.
In the meantime, join my newsletter so that you can become the best version of yourself!
Here are a few more posts you may like:
- How to be enough for yourself
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- 9 reasons why friends come and go
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- 7 healthy habits to develop in your 30s (for women)
- 13 polite ways to handle unsolicited advice
- How to say no without feeling crappy
- 13 ways to feel loved when nobody loves you
- 23 ways to let loose and be yourself
- How to forgive yourself for hurting someone